Bombed Out

So I went to take this Photoshop test and another one for this editing program called Vegas. It’s for a job at a place called Go TV networks. They create video content for cell phones. I have zero interest in that type of thing, but it’s editing and the wife of a friend works there, so she hooked me up.

Long story short, I failed miserably. The first few Photoshop projects went fine, but then there was one where I had to type some text. This should be a very simple process, but I couldn’t get the damn text tool to work. I tried everything I knew and I still couldn’t get the thing working. ( I came home and tried it. It worked no problem, damn.)

I sat there for a few minutes and looked around the office. A cube farm on the third floor of some modern bland building. There was very little noise and the conversation that could be heard was dull. I realized I didn’t want the job. I don’t think I could enjoy it. I’d go nuts with the lack of activity and the product I’d be helping produce.

Is it because I’m lazy? Is it because I want to fail and end up living on the street? It’s possible, I do feel like giving up quite a bit. All of my past experience has basically penned me as a failure. So why should I keep on fighting. It’s that thing in me that doesn’t want me to give up, but it’s also that part of me that feels he’s owed something. My past should give me the points to land something big.

It’s like that Jim Croce song, “Workin’ At The Carwash Blues”. Never heard of it? Basically I should be further along than I am and deserve to be. But I need to start low and work my way up. I need to gain skills and trust. I know, I know, I’m just being impatient.


This is one job lost. Not my life. I’ll miss out on several before I land something. Maybe I’ll like it, maybe not. I just need to keep trying.

To quote Batman begins, “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.”

Man I wish I were a crime fighter in a costume. I hear they have great medical and dental.