Sync Whole

My mind is racing and going nuts. There is this verge of panic rushing through me, but I know it's just a brief phase. It's never fun to go through because it slows down my ability to get anything done, hence I make no progress, hence it stimulates the cycle of panic.

I pulled an all night editing session. I take these little gigs for the cash of course, but they aren't exactly healthy. The way it works is some bullshit company throws a party for their bullshit product, or chosen fashionable charity. This entails inviting a d-list of celebrities who are interviewed on a red carpet, get a goodie bag of expensive things, then sneak out the back door with the loot. My job is to take the footage, cut it down to a 10 minute show reel and it is then sent out to media outlets who use clips and D-lister quotes on news or entertainment programs. The party is thrown at 8PM and the reel needs to be done and out the door by 8AM. Therefore I work all night.

So I get no sleep, I'm jacked on caffeine, nicotine and candy bars. I grow out of sync with the real world. That is saying I'm in sync with the real world the rest of the time. This is up for debate, of course.

No one else is in my tree. I mean it must be high or low. That is you can't, you know, tune in but it's all right. I mean I guess it's not too bad.

Music quotes running wild.

So, I'm sitting here trying to get a grip when really I just need to give up on the day, relax, sleep sound tonight and get a fresh start in the morning. A tough thing to do for someone who is always trying to think or take in information, or output information. My sense of control goes on spring break and my concious ridicules me for it. Rather silly actually.


It all makes me wish I had a small office somewhere. A place I could go to work, so home could be home. Even if I slack off at the office, I'm there. When I slack off at home, I feel I should be doing something that will help me and my situation.

I just need to rest. Where the hell is the mailman with my Netflix?